A Reflection on Growth, Gratitude, and the Gifts of Experience

For a long time, I wrestled with a quiet voice that asked, “Did I get here because of chance?”

Even when things went well- when teams thrived and projects hit their mark - I often gave the credit to timing, good fortune, or the people around me. What I’ve learned over time is that humility isn’t about downplaying what we bring to the table. It’s about seeing that growth is never a solo act. It’s built on shared effort, learning, and trust.

As I look back, three themes have shaped my journey and continue to define my work today.

Systems That Serve People

I’ve always been fascinated by what happens beneath the surface - the systems that influence how people work, communicate, and connect. Behind every policy, process, or platform sits a human experience that can either be empowered or frustrated by design.

My focus has always been to make systems work for people. 

That means turning complexity into clarity, creating multiple paths to success that honour different styles and needs, while aligning processes with shared values.

I believe real change happens when people understand not just what to do, but why it matters. That’s why I don’t buy into one-day workshops or quick-fix training. 

Meaningful growth takes time. 

It needs repetition, reflection, and real-life practice-learning that moves, stretches, and sticks.

Growing Leaders Who Grow Others

Leadership isn’t a title - it’s a relationship. The strongest leaders know how to adapt, communicate with honesty, and help others rise.

When people understand their own patterns-how they work best, how they react under pressure, and how they affect others - they begin to lead with more empathy and purpose. 

Self-awareness opens the door to understanding others, and understanding others builds trust.

I’ve seen entire teams shift when space is made for open conversation. Tension becomes productive. Listening deepens. People start showing up with more intention. 

That’s the kind of learning I love to guide - growth that’s steady, practical, and human.

Turning Knowledge Into Connection

In my work, I’ve become deeply interested in how knowledge becomes connection. Data can tell us where we are, but emotional intelligence tells us why. When we combine the two - logic with heart - we create strong, lasting performance.

True credibility doesn’t come from titles or achievements. It comes from trust, curiosity, and courage-the willingness to keep learning and evolving.

Where I Stand Today

I’ve come to see that doubt isn’t a flaw. It’s a sign that we still care. It keeps us growing and grounded in gratitude. 

Every step I’ve taken, every skill I’ve sharpened, was shaped by others who offered trust, feedback, or encouragement.

Today, my work is about helping others build that same confidence - rooted not in perfection, but in alignment. 

Because in the end, success isn’t about luck. It’s about connection - between who we are, what we value, and how we serve.

What Emotional Intelligence Really Looks Like in a Team

Are you a leader wondering what emotional intelligence actually looks like in a team setting? 

We tend to picture the obvious red flags - constant tension, coworkers avoiding each other, or someone breaking down week after week.

But here’s the tricky part: many people assume that “good” emotional intelligence means showing no emotion at all. That couldn’t be further from the truth.

When team members repress their feelings, they may look calm on the outside, but inside they’re disconnected. Over time, this distance shows up as a lack of empathy, flexibility, and genuine commitment to the group. It’s hard to build trust when people avoid showing their real selves.

On the flip side, when people allow themselves to feel and express a full range of emotions, they open the door to connection. Think about the moments that matter in your workplace.

When someone hits a big milestone - do teammates celebrate the win, share the excitement, and give recognition? Or does the achievement barely get noticed before the group moves on to the next task?

And when life takes a difficult turn, how does the team respond? Is it a quick card passed around with a signature and a donation toward flowers, followed by business as usual? Or do coworkers step up, check in, and shift some workload so the person feels supported not just as an employee, but as a human being?

Emotional intelligence in leadership is about more than keeping it together under pressure. It’s about using your emotions - both the joyful and the painful - as signals that help you understand yourself and those around you. 

A leader with strong emotional intelligence doesn’t shy away from feelings. They pay attention to them and respond in a way that builds trust, connection, and resilience within the team.

This doesn’t mean every workplace needs to turn into a therapy session. What it does mean is recognizing that people are people first. Work gets done better when everyone feels seen, valued, and supported.

So, take a look at your team. Are they only functioning on the surface, or are they thriving because emotional intelligence is alive in the day-to-day culture? The answer might tell you more than any performance review ever could.

The Big Squeeze – Managers in the Middle

Middle managers live in the tension between the demands from above and the needs of the team below.

They’re expected to translate strategy into action while supporting individuals, resolving conflict, hitting performance targets, and maintaining morale.

It’s a lot.

Often, these managers are promoted from within. They know the work, they’ve earned trust, and they’re seen as dependable. But that very familiarity can complicate their transition into leadership. One day, they’re shoulder to shoulder with their peers. The next, they’re expected to lead those same colleagues - sometimes without clear guidance, authority, or the confidence that they’re “doing it right.”

The shift from being part of the team to leading it can be disorienting. The social contracts they built others as “one of the gang” can feel like something they need to protect. This can lead to hesitation around holding boundaries, having hard conversations, or asserting authority. Add to that the pressure from senior leaders to deliver results, and it’s no wonder middle managers often feel squeezed from both sides.

What makes the difference?

Not a one-day course. Not a checklist. Not crash course training.

Real leadership development takes time. 

It requires space to reflect on personal patterns - how one reacts under stress, how decisions are made, and how communication shifts in different environments. It involves seeing where trust breaks down on a team and understanding what drives - OR - derails collaboration.

It takes courage to look in the mirror and ask:

• Where am I getting in my own way?

• How do I lead people who are different from me?

• What kind of leader do I actually want to be?

The best learning opportunities don’t flood people with content - don’t even get me started on content! As a society we are overrun with hacks and how to’s, digital boards and save lists that are overflowing but not being utilized.

The best learning opportunities - create stretch moments. 

They invite challenge, yes, but also provide space to practice, to misstep, and to try again.

They build awareness around different workstyles and motivators, help identify emotional triggers and strengths, and deepen insight into how trust is built (and broken) in teams.

This kind of paced learning helps a manager move from managing the work to leading the people.

If we want our middle managers to grow into senior leaders and not just survive the squeeze, we need to invest in learning that’s intentional, paced, and rooted in real-world application.

Their development isn’t a checkbox. It’s a commitment.